4 Ways to Empower your Child Through Reflections

by 7 December 202131 comments

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ

In the name of God, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

4 Ways to Empower your Child Through Reflections

by Farida Haji

There are numerous benefits of self-reflection practices. It empowers your child and improves their physical and mental wellness.

  • Creating a sense of awareness to deal with challenging situations and complex emotions.
  • Encourages them to accept mistakes and take responsibility for their actions.
  • Cultivates various aspects of the personality, like intrapersonal and interpersonal communication skills, increases confidence and self-motivation.

Kahlil Gibran has an interesting take on parenting in his book, The Prophet (Knopf, 1923)

“Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.”

This poetry has a gentle way of describing an aspect of parenthood.
Do not push your expectations on your child.
Be present and nurture them so they can progress and shine.

How to practice self-reflection methods with children?

Young minds can easily be trained. Cultivating reflection methods is not the most laborious part, but sustaining those habits is. It may be difficult to expect children to follow the same practices adults use for introspection.

We would like to share simple practices of self-reflection you can incorporate into your child’s daily routine and empower them.

1. Providing a safe environment.

Be it at home or outside. Make sure your child is in a conducive environment. A space where they feel secure. When they attempt to try new things, praise their efforts. Refrain from overreacting to everything they do. Do not let their critical voice overpower them. Teach them to love and believe in themselves.

  • Explore their comfort zones and preferences
  • Understand their physical and mental abilities
  • Share the bounties of Allah and teach them to show gratitude.
  • Practice values, so they learn and are not forcefully taught.

2. Create a routine.

A routine does not have to be rigid. It can be a simple slot of a few minutes when you practice meditation techniques. Set apart sometime during the day and exchange thoughts. After maghrib, or before you sleep or when you are playing together.

Focus on activities you can do together that require minimal stress and are not distracting. When you make time for them, they value themselves and the time spent.

  • Take a walk.
  • Indulge in a craft
  • Reading or writing
  • Pick a sport
  • Discover a hobby

iStock 868370336 4 Ways to Empower your Child Through Reflections

3. Develop communication skills:

Intrapersonal communication cultivates self-awareness among children. Effective communication leads to efficient decision-making. Guide children to think before they act and allow them to take time and reflect on their strengths, weaknesses, and the consequences that follow.  

Relationships are a crucial element for a child while growing up. A stable and strong relationship with an adult improves interpersonal communication. This makes them independent, self-motivated, reliable, and mature.

  • Allow your child to share their story. Most importantly, listen. 
  • Share stories of your day. Make them feel important. 
  • Play their favorite game together. 
  • Strike conversations 
  • Sit with them for five more minutes and pray together before they sleep.

4. Express your Emotions

Allowing your child to express their feelings and emotions empowers them to take responsibility for how they feel and behave. Encourage your child to open up to you while you do the same as well.

Children mirror adults. If we express ourselves, children will do the same without hesitation. Emotions are complex. It can be difficult for children to explain what they are going through. As adults, if we confide reasons and reactions to our behavior, it normalizes the expression of emotions and boosts their confidence and self-esteem.

  • Consider talking to them about reactions different emotions can cause. 
  • Explain why you may have reacted in a certain way.
  • Allow them to explain themselves when they make mistakes
  • Direct their energies to calm them during frustrating moments
  • Most importantly, let them know it is ok to cry and ask for a hug.

Let us know in the comments if you have other ways of practicing self reflection methods with your children.

31 Comments

  1. Dramé

    Very good. I really love this 4 points.

    Reply
    • Maria Regina Reina Prats

      It’s inspiring????❤️

      Reply
      • Halima Diallo

        Love the article, very resourceful.

        Reply
    • Fatou

      JazakAllah Khairan Ameen very important and useful informations

      Reply
      • Rokeya

        ZazakAllah Khairan

        Reply
    • Mutawakil Saliu

      It’s very thoughtful and insightful. Jazakallahu Khair

      Reply
      • Abiola

        Very helpful tips

        Reply
      • Tourè Sohna

        MASHAALLAH.

        Reply
  2. Kusimo Habeeb Precious

    Awesome

    Reply
  3. Hawa Ahmed

    A very useful reminder and definitely much needed for I myself need guidance to give guidance

    Reply
    • Bilqees

      Very informative.

      Reply
  4. Mutawakil Saliu

    Very lucid. Jazakallahu Khair

    Reply
    • Rokeya

      ZazakAllah Khairan ,for this beneficial thougths .I hope we get more…

      Reply
  5. Mohammed Marwan

    May Allah bless you. I really enjoyed this article a lot. I have learn alot and about how to teach my son. Allah bless you. Alhamdulillah

    Reply
  6. Syed

    Assalaam o Alikum. I am very impressed by your 4 points ???? totally understand and agree with it .May Allah give you ajjar and courage to discuss similar topics in future. Allah hafiz.

    Reply
    • Atiya khizer

      Alhamdulillah great advice, Allah swt give you strength to give more advice in all around life aspects. I am learning a lot. Allah hafiz

      Reply
  7. Fatima

    Jazakumu Allah khaire for this beautiful and beneficial text specially in current time it will be appreciated if there are more text like that shared thanks

    Reply
  8. Abdul

    Awesome

    Reply
  9. M A Bey

    Alhamdullilah very informative and definitely a good idea may ALLAH continue to bless you so we can help our children

    Reply
  10. Khadija Sheikhsuja

    I need it and it’s powerful massage

    Reply
  11. Rukiya

    Jazakumu Allah khaire for this beautiful and beneficial information ❤️❤️❤️

    Reply
  12. Babs

    I have learned something new that’s helpful. Thanks

    Reply
  13. Abdul Maroof

    Excellent,very productive article regarding parenting

    Reply
  14. Mrwa

    MeshaAllah <3 I especially enjoyed the poem

    Reply
  15. Lissa Gaye My Email Address

    Alhamdulillah. May Ya Allah SWT continue to bless you thank you very much this is very helpful

    Reply
  16. Shama

    Very helpful and informative

    Reply
  17. Rhonda

    Alhamdulilah this has come at a time when I need it most. I’m having some difficulty with my son, he’s been misbehaving at school. Started as minor problems, has escalated to being disrespectful(at home to me today I’m actually his step mom). I have found this to be very informative, I may have been going about it the wrong way!

    Reply
  18. Peju

    Mashallah ! Very beneficial post, may Allah reward you.

    Reply
  19. Musah Issahaku

    Really loved the poem

    Reply
  20. Salleh bin Jan

    In Syaa Allah it’s very helpful and valuable sharing.Thank you and may Allah bless you and family

    Reply

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